Are You Emotionally Intelligent to Lead Effectively?
Emotional Intelligence or EQ is a term thrown around in professional circles a lot but what does it actually mean?
Having strong EQ means you can be aware of, control, and express your emotions, as well as handle your professional relationships empathetically. It is recognizing, understanding, and choosing how you think, feel, and act. It shapes your interactions with others and your understanding of yourself, defines how and what you learn, allows you to set priorities, and determines your responses to situations.
Here’s the truth: Your impact and effectiveness as a professional and leader require more than just your diligence, performance, and good ideas. You need all that plus strong EQ because it’s as important that you understand, inspire, and motivate those around you and those whom you lead.
EQ is broken into four quadrants that focus on self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. Enhancing your professional relationships and ensuring the personal well-being of individuals you lead and engage with and are key outcomes to developing emotional intelligence.
Empathy is key to developing high EQ. But it’s important to remember the difference between sympathy and empathy, as the two are often confused. Empathy is feeling with and Sympathy is feeling for. Big difference. Empathy sounds like, I get it, I’ve been there, I feel for you. Sympathy sounds like, I’m sorry for you, You poor thing.
Empathy is about connection. In contrast to being something – empathy is something that is offered, a connection at an emotional level that is deeply felt, which resonates.
Being able to identify and label your emotions is a key and pivotal element to building emotional intelligence and empathy. The more specific you can be with your emotions, the better you can communicate and understand others.
In our fragmented, disconnected, divisive culture, I believe embracing empathy is the key to authentic connection, and more importantly, effective leadership. We’ve all missed the empathy train in our lives. But empathy is a skill that can be improved upon or learned, albeit a difficult one to master.
When your leadership brand is anchored in an attribute like empathy, your ability to connect with your audience in authentic, resonant ways puts the focus on building meaningful experiences with them front and center. As a leader, having empathy lead your brand identity means you show you care deeply about your people and demonstrate this by aligning your actions and behavior with this truth.
The guidelines for communicating with others in emotionally connecting ways include these components:
1. Emotional understanding: Understanding the problem through the other person’s point of view. The ability to accurately read another's emotions and connect with your own. The emotions wheel below is a great tool you can refer to to get a better grasp on how to name and identify your emotions and others.
2. Respect: The recognition and full acceptance of the other person as a human being.
3. Authenticity: Being transparent and vulnerable and showing up in a real and relatable way.
4. Mirroring: The ability to identify and reiterate the other person’s words and feelings.
5. Active Listening: In coaching, we refer to this as listening at Level 3—where we hear not just what is said, but also what is unsaid and can identify our client’s emotional state.
6. Understanding: Seeing the other person’s perspective, and being able to put yourself in their shoes, and respect their feelings on a matter speaks volumes about a person’s capacity with EQ.
With your emotional intelligence skills honed, you'll be better equipped to navigate, strategize, and adapt to any circumstance, situation, or interaction to benefit yourself, others, and all collaborating parties.
Natalie Jobity is a leadership and career coach, consultant, brand strategist, bestselling author, mentor, speaker, and facilitator who has earned a reputation as "The Brilliance Unveiler." She empowers female leaders to live in the fullness of their purpose and unveil their brilliance by leveraging the power of their strengths, expertise, and distinctiveness, so they make transformative impact in their sphere of influence.
Visit Natalie’s website to learn more about how she partners with leaders with her signature “Unveil Your Brilliance” program and her "Brand Your Biz Like a Boss" consulting service.