Overthinking: Is it the silent barrier to your growth and success?

A few weeks ago, I joined my friend and her two daughters at a local sunflower festival. One of the attractions was a massive slide atop a hill, where you rode down in a tire-tube.

My initial instinct was to decline—my adventurous spirit had faded, and thoughts of potential risks clouded my mind.

But there was Violet, the vivacious seven-year-old, pleading for me to slide down in the tire-tube with her. Her infectious enthusiasm made it hard to resist.

Choosing to bypass my usual tendency to overthink, I silenced my safety concerns and said yes, albeit with a big gulp in my throat.

As I squeezed my 6-foot adult frame into the tube with Violet on my lap, the doubt returned, screaming, "Natalie, are you crazy?" "This is a terrible idea!" "You're going to get hurt!" Yet, I had committed, so I took a deep breath and held it as the operator pushed us down.

OMG, it was a blast! Violet's excitement filled the air she screamed as her dress fluttered around, and I couldn't stop laughing. If anything, my only regret was that the ride didn't last longer than those thrilling 10 seconds. It was a special moment where my playful side emerged, and I savored it, reveling in the freedom to just enjoy the present. (You can watch the fun clip HERE).

Overthinking: A Double-edged Sword

I understand that my tendency to overthink everything comes from childhood experiences and my DNA. This has constrained my choices, as I tend to operate with a filter of seriousness, safety, and vigilance in the way I approach life.

I recognize that my tendency to overthink stems from my upbringing and DNA, which has led me to approach life with seriousness, safety, and vigilance.

Overthinking has its advantages, especially as a SWINK (Single Woman + Immigrant with No Kids—an acronym I’ve made up from the DINK one). It's a key part of my strategic thinking, a top CliftonStrengths talent, and it serves me well. I've made logical, proactive choices that have safeguarded my well-being.

However, this same overthinking often steers me toward safe, predictable, responsible, and not-so-fun options in life. I've learned, albeit through a challenging journey, that letting go of this need for constant "safety" allows me to be the free, autonomous Natalie I was designed to be. It unleashes my brilliance and infuses more joy into both work and life.

I am sure you can relate to this tendency to overthink .

As high achievers, we possess incredible traits—determination, ambition, and a constant drive for success. While these qualities help propel us forward, they also come at a cost.

Our constant need for perfection can lead to overthinking, causing us to second-guess ourselves and get caught in a loop of analysis paralysis.

This is why overthinking is a double-edged sword that can hinder our progress, stunt our growth and lead to a lack of fulfillment, even as it helps us plan ahead, be proactive, and make strategic decisions. It can be a mental quagmire that stifles our productivity and well-being.

When we overthink, we tend to play it safe, avoiding risks and opportunities that could lead to significant breakthroughs. We become trapped in our own minds, doubting our abilities, and lacking the confidence to make decisions.

Overthinking not only hinders our decision-making but also affects our overall well-being. It robs us of the present moment, leaving us unfulfilled and disconnected from our true potential. By constantly dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, we miss out on the opportunities right in front of us.

Letting Go of Overthinking: Unlocking Your Power to Lead Unapologetically

Fortunately, there are practical strategies that can help us break free from the cycle of excessive rumination and self-doubt. Here are four salient ones:

Embracing Imperfection: Overthinking often stems from a desire for constant perfection. We may fear making mistakes or not meeting our own high standards. Embracing imperfection means acknowledging that it's okay to make errors and that we are not defined by them. It encourages us to learn from our experiences and view setbacks as opportunities for growth. When we let go of the need for perfection, we can approach challenges with a more open mind and a greater sense of ease. I encourage you to check out my book, It’s Your Time to Shine Girland read pages 91-99 which address tackling perfectionism in more detail.

Adopting a Growth Mindset: "As a woman thinks, so is she." This profound quote adapted from Proverbs 23:7, reminds us that our thoughts and beliefs are the architects of our destiny, especially when it comes to our careers. Your mind is a remarkable force capable of shaping your reality. When you think with confidence, determination, and unwavering belief in your abilities, you unlock the potential to achieve greatness. Your thoughts are like seeds. And these seeds grow into plants when the soil of your heart is fertile. These plants bear the flowers/fruit which are the results we see in our lives. To ensure that your plants blossom to their fullest capacity, your seeds—your thoughts—must be positive, empowering ones, and come from a healthy mindset.

In your career journey, it's essential to nurture a growth mindset—one that knows no boundaries. Challenge self-doubt, break through limitations, and let your aspirations guide you towards success. Dr Anita Philips just released a book titled The Garden Within which dives WAY deep into these principles. I highly recommend you check it out! 

Setting Realistic Goals and Priorities: Overthinking often arises when we feel overwhelmed by the magnitude of our tasks or goals. To overcome this, we can break down our objectives into smaller, more manageable steps. By doing so, we not only make the task at hand less daunting but also give ourselves a sense of accomplishment as we complete each step. Setting clear priorities helps us focus on what truly matters, preventing us from getting lost in a sea of possibilities.

Seeking Support and Guidance: Working with a coach can provide valuable insights and perspective. Coaches like me offer constructive feedback, challenge your thought patterns, and help you develop effective strategies to navigate complex situations. This support can be especially beneficial in gaining confidence and clarity in your decision-making process.

Is Your Overthinking Getting in the Way of Your Success?

As you can tell from my story above, I’ve walked (and I’m still walking out) this tendency to play it safe over acting in full alignment with myself. Instead of focusing so much on safety, lately, I’m focusing much more on fulfillment and fun.

Because in this season of my life where the years ahead are much shorter than the years behind me, I want to receive ALL that is available to me, so that I can have the most abundant life possible for me on this side of eternity.

Don’t you want the same too? 

A question I ask myself often to ensure I'm not fixated on my intellect, which I suggest you do too, is "How can I incorporate more "play" in this experience?" When I approach my life from that perspective, I am more inclined to embrace fun, awe, curiosity, and spontaneity. 

If you resonate with the high-achiever profile of perfectionism, performing, and pleasing, (the three-headed gremlin as I like to call them), then let’s chat so I can show you how I can support you in moving from where you may feel stuck right now to where you desire to be—in life and in your career!

Because it IS your time to shine sister! And if you’re not getting through my book (which I highly recommend!), perhaps you need more support. I’ve got you!

Check out my Unveil Your Brilliance Program and set up a time for us to explore how our partnership can help you overcome your limiting beliefs and behaviors so you’re positioned for success and fulfillment in your life and career!

If Unveil Your Brilliance seems too intimidating for you right now, check out my Strengths Strategy Session or my Breakthrough Coaching offers. 

As we transition out of winter in my neck of the woods, here's to a great start to your spring season!

Natalie
The Brilliance Unveiler 

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As "The Brilliance Unveiler," Natalie Jobity leverages more than fifteen years of experience empowering hundreds of women as an image consultant and now as a leadership elevation coach & personal brand strategist of The Unveiled Way. She empowers heart-centered, high-achieving women seeking to make their divinely designed impact, to operate in their brilliance so they are positioned to lead authentically and unapologetically in their arena.

Natalie Jobity is an ICF-certified coach, bestselling author, mentor, speaker, and facilitator who recently published her second book titled, It’s Your Time to Shine, Girl: Own Your Brilliance, Step into Your Influence, and Lead Like a Trailblazer. This leadership development and empowerment book and her She Shines Affirmation card deck, will inspire women the world over to step into their purpose, and also give them the tips, tools, and techniques needed to succeed and thrive as a woman of influence. 

Visit Natalie’s website to learn more about how she partners with purpose-driven women to propel them forward so their impact and influence increase. Discover your leadership posture and style by taking Natalie’s popular assessment, LeadHer Way Brand Identity Assessment.



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